real.

My whole life... MY WHOLE LIFE - I thought I had to act like the person they thought I was.

I had to act like a lady, smile even though I was fed up, and do things for others that I REALLY didn't want to.
Sometimes I don't talk about what's really going on in my mind because I think "who the hell is really going to care?". I've talked before about things on my heart, and things Im passionate about and usually people give me one of two reactions

1. thats good Jessica which means "shut up, you really don't think like that" or 2. a smile that says "I'm only half listening"

Somedays SOMEDAYS I wish people acted the way they wanted, loved more than is allowed, said what was truly on their minds, and allowed themselves to be truly real.

So in this lifetime, IN THIS DAY Im going to act like I care - when I actually do, and say "no" when I don't want to do something because being true to myself and real with others matters more to me than being pleasant and the person they believe I am.